


november 2nd

by magnusthemighty



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel cuddles, I LOVE SAM CAN YOU TELL, M/M, Sad Sam, Sam Knows, Sam is adorable, Sam's POV, sam smiles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-25 04:42:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4947118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magnusthemighty/pseuds/magnusthemighty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>November 2nd is always tough. But Cas is always there; and tonight Sam appreciates it more than ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	november 2nd

**Author's Note:**

> Send me prompts here: http://destiel-breaks-my-heart.tumblr.com/ask  
> More drabbles not yet on ao3 here: http://destiel-breaks-my-heart.tumblr.com/tagged/my%20drabbles

“I just miss you, Jess.”

Sam runs over the words again and again in his head. He never says much when he visits the grave, mainly because it’s been 10 years and what can he say now? He’s sorry? It’s his fault?  
Yeah, if she’s listening, she knows it by now.

Usually he visits just some point near early November, usually there’s a job they have to work on November 2nd to distract himself and Dean from the day. The day that their mother died, and 22 years later, Jess too.

But this year there isn’t. The Darkness has brought on an uncomfortable radio-silence that they refuse to trust, but can’t exactly do anything about either.  
So Sam travelled down yesterday and stayed a night in Stanford, Kansas.

He parks Baby in the Bunker’s garage - Dean let him take her because, to quote, “it’s not as if I’m going anywhere.”  
His brother hides his pain well, but he can still see through it, when he gets lost in thought or his voice breaks in conversation.

Cas hasn’t left the Bunker since they found him. Rowena’s spell pretty much tore up his grace, and sometimes it still affects him, his eyes turning red and he starts to snarl and shake, but a few words from Dean eventually calm him.

The halls are silent, and Sam doesn’t blame Dean for sleeping through everything - it’s midnight, early for them.  
He dumps his duffle onto his bed and changes into some loose sweatpants and a t-shirt, before heading to the kitchen with the intent of drinking his sorrows away.

Sam passes through the lounge and flicks the corner lamp on, picking up an empty glass from the table. He nearly reaches the kitchen before he stops in his tracks.

“..Sam?” Cas’ voice is tired and muffled, but he hears it. He turns to the far couch, where his voice is coming from.

Cas is on his side, back against the back of the couch. A small blanket is barely touching him, but rather more to the front of the couch, and Sam finally gets it as his eyes adjust.

Cas is on his side, wedged between the back of the couch, and _Dean._ Their legs are tangled together, Dean’s head is tucked under Cas’ chin, resting in the warmth of his neck. Dean’s arms are wrapped securely around Cas’ torso, whereas Cas’ arms are draped over Dean’s back. Dean’s bare feet are twisted around, Sam suspects, in order to claim the warmth from Cas’ calves.

“Hey, Cas” Sam half-smiles, turning more to face the two as he leans against the doorway.

“Dean was worried. He wanted to call you, but I advised against it.” Cas informs, attempting to sit up a little, but Dean’s unconscious form tightens around him.

“Thanks, Cas, I uh, I turned my phone off, anyway.” Sam nods, appreciating the angel’s consideration. “Is he, uh, good?”

“He struggled a lot with today.” Cas responds, left hand rubbing Dean’s back slowly, his right curling in Dean’s hair despite being wedged between the couch arm and Dean’s shoulder. “Did you know Mary used to sing for him?”

“No, I- I didn’t.” Sam feels his throat tighten, and he fidgets with the glass in his hand, looking down.

“‘Hey Jude’, actually. I’d never heard it. He played it for me,” Cas gestures to the record player to the left of the couch, “and eventually fell asleep.” He holds Dean a little closer, but his eyes survey Sam now. “Are you alright, Sam?”

Sam has to look away, but he can feel those piercing blue eyes bore into his skull. “I left her flowers. Don’t- Dean doesn’t like her grave. Mom’s, I mean. I think it’s just because we didn’t have a hand in organising it. But I left her flowers, on my way back from Jess’. I left them both flowers.”  
He can feel his eyes watering and his voice getting thicker. Damn it.

“I’m sure they appreciated it, Sam.” Cas says soothingly. “I always liked flowers.”

Sam smiles, looking at Cas now. “You should tell Dean. We’ll start picking them up when we can.”

“Really?” Cas’ eyes light up a little, and Sam can see just how much that means to him. No wonder Dean’s in love with him, the guy perks up at the sound of his name.

“Yeah, Cas.” Sam nods. “Maybe in the summer, we can get a garden going outside.”

“I’d like that.” Cas smiles, looking relaxed. “The bees will help - maybe I could get a bee house, and make honey again, and-” he pauses, looking at Sam’s curled form.  
“You've had a long trip, Sam. Get some rest.”

“Thanks, Cas.” Sam leaves the glass on the table, turning back in the direction he came from. Before he leaves, though, he wants to say something.

“Hey, Cas?”. Cas turns his head to face him, intent. Sam continues. “Thank you. I mean, for everything. And- and for him. Just…he needs you, y'know? Thanks for staying.”

Cas smiles, his lips brushing against Dean’s hairline. “It’s an honour, Sam, to be needed by him. But thank you. Goodnight.”

“Night, Cas.”  
Sam gives a lazy wave and smiles, taking in the scene once more before turning into the dark of the corridor.

**Author's Note:**

> Send me prompts here: http://destiel-breaks-my-heart.tumblr.com/ask  
> More drabbles not yet on ao3 here: http://destiel-breaks-my-heart.tumblr.com/tagged/my%20drabbles


End file.
